For anyone wondering, the title is nothing more than reference made to a “step-by-step” description of recent events surrounding the outlandish claims of Greg Quinlan. Quinlan describes himself as an ex-gay and a “lobbyist” for families.
(Personally, I could not care less what a person’s sexual orientation is. If they once identified as gay and now claim to be straight, it’s their right even if I’ve my doubts as to whether someone who is gay “can ever, in all honesty” convert to heterosexuality. Too many of these so-called conversions have later expressed regret over their false claims of homo-sobriety only to then admit they have been and always will be attracted to members of the same gender.)
Quinlan states, “I’ve known thousands of homosexuals and I’ve never met someone who was not introduced to sex at an early age, generally with the same sex.“ Bullshit Alert! He never met me. I’m forty-eight, a homosexual, had a great family life growing up (which has carried over into my adult life) and the only sex I had as a child and teen was with myself, slapping the willy around just as the vast majority of other pubescent teens have admitted to having done .
Even though I had long since realized and accepted I was gay, I did not have sex with another person until after my twenty-first birthday (this is the God’s-honest truth though some reading might claim otherwise; whatever). I’m not saying my experience is representative of all homosexuals; I’m certain it isn’t. Everybody has their own story to tell—everybody’s life and his or her situation growing up is different.
The point is, Greg Quinlan and many others who argue that homosexuality is a sin or is counter-productive to family values, make these outlandish claims as if such statements are an accurate portrayal of all LGBTQ persons. They throw the rhetoric out there, as if it carries more weight than the statements made by those who are gay and have no problem with their sexual orientation. I believe that much of what motivates the ex-gay to say and do the things he or she does, is simply an attempt to “fit in and be accepted by those who have been judging them throughout their lives,” causing the individual to feel badly about him- or herself. Those detractors who base their criticism of homosexuals on ignorance or justify same with mistranslated or misunderstood Bible scripture, just like any other group scrambling to gain traction for their message of intolerance (and perhaps even hate), will stop at nothing to cast the subject of their prejudice in a negative light. Is it so unlikely to think the ex-gay, in an attempt to gain their [previously established] tormentor’s admiration and approval, cannot emulate that same behavior? It happens far more often than many would like to admit.
In the case of Quinlan, he accuses Wayne Besen of encouraging others to harm him through statements such as “ S .”TRONG, libelous allegations according to Wayne Besen and Truth Wins Out, who claim the indictments were never made. The law offices of Michael B. Hamar PC (representing Truth Wins Out and Besen in the matter) sent a strongly worded letter on December 7th to Greg Quinlan in care of the organization, Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays, of which Mr. Quinlan is the President. The letter, which you can view a copy of here, outlines all of the steps PFOX, its Executive Director (Regina Griggs) and Mr. Quinlan will need to take within five days; otherwise, TWO and Mr. Besen have put the organization on notice that they will seek relief in a court of law.
I doubt that TWO would have gone to all the effort of hiring an attorney for something like this unless they felt very strongly that the plaintiff clearly and knowingly made false allegations. To put it another way, I believe Greg Quinlan, in his hurry to gain media attention and the approval of others, has really stepped in a pile of shit this time.
Lest you think that I admire and respect everything that Wayne Besen has done and said over the years, that isn’t so much the case. He can at times be rather aggressive, cocky and (imo) something of a weight around the ankles when it comes to our (the LGBTQ community’s) quest for tolerance, acceptance and equality. I say the same thing about others, like Dan Savage for instance. But even so, some of what they do and say are things with which I can agree. Just as with any other individual or organized group, you take the bad with the good—or you walk away.
If you want to watch the interview in which Quinlan makes his ridiculous allegations against Besen, or you want to read a response I made to Wayne Besen about his aggressive attitude toward another poster who had commented on one of the pages where the interview was made available, you can do so here.